Talking to someone might seem frightening but it’s the first step in changing your situation
What happens when you report anti-social behaviour: mate crime
Mate crime is when a person pretends to be a friend so they can abuse and exploit someone. That abuse could be financial, physical, emotional or sexual and could be in person or online, or both.
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A common type of mate crime is someone who regularly asks to borrow money but rarely, if ever, pays it back. They might visit around pay day and pressurise their victim into ‘lending’ them cash, handing over their bank card or buying them things.
In some cases, people carrying out mate crime hurt or humiliate their victim in front of others, or persuade them to carry out sexual acts. Another example is if someone takes over their victim’s home, inviting people in or asking them to store items for them. This is called cuckooing and you can read more about this here.
None of this is something that a real friend would do. No one should make you feel unsafe or make you do something you’re not comfortable with.
What to do if you think you’re a victim of mate crime
It can be hard to ask for help if you’re affected by this, especially if the person doing it is someone you think of as a friend, or is a carer or family member. Please know that you can contact us or speak directly with a bpha colleague and we’ll help, including getting you specialist support.
If you’re being financially abused, our Money Advice Team can help you to end this and report it to the police. Talking to someone might seem frightening but it’s the first step in changing your situation – if you’ve been told not to tell anyone, it’s because your ‘friend’ is relying on you staying quiet so they can continue to abuse you.
Recognising if someone you know is a victim of mate crime
Mate crime could happen to anyone. Often people who also have learning disabilities, a mental health, are elderly and vulnerable, or have substance misuse issues can be easier to target.
You might notice that someone you know is:
- Unable to pay bills
- Missing items from their home
- Cutting off friends and family
- Undermined and disrespected by their ‘friend’
- Has injuries and/or weight loss or gain
- Changing their usual routine
- In possession of gifts or money.
Targeting someone with a disability is a hate crime and will be taken very seriously if reported. Please report your concerns to the police, or speak with us for some guidance.